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Week 1 :: Personal Myth

To respect your privacy, the videos will be deleted at the end of each Yoga of Relationships Immersion. This private page is only available to the group for the duration of the immersion.

Weekly Recap

  • Attachment theory states that the security (or lack thereof) of the bonds we received as children determine our adult attachment style in relationships.

  • We seek to recreate the form of “love” that we received as children. In other words, we recreate relationships that feel similar to our nervous system as adults.

  • Epigenetics is the study of how trauma is passed down on the layer on top of our DNA.

  • We can use methods of subconscious and subtle body healing such as meditation, energy work, plants, etc. to rewire patterns in the brain/nervous system, and create balanced and healthy relationships.

  • Myths as stories can inspire freshness in our relationships and take us beyond our patterns.

  • A myth that limits us is an un-investigated story that we subconsciously believe in.

Reflections

  • What types of partners/relationships do you seem to attract?

  • What coping strategies do you employ when triggered in relationships? (eating, sleeping, spiritual practice, sex, work, internet, TV)

  • What cultural, familial, or religious myths did you grow up with? (“All men are unreliable cheaters”, “We are genetically predisposed to addiction”, “God will punish you for xyz”)

  • What myths/stories were you attracted to in childhood? Which characters did you resonate with and why?


Week 2 :: Working with Wounds

Weekly Recap

  • Looking at previous/current relationships will show us recurrent patterns and determine our “attachment style” (anxious, avoidant, secure) in various relationships

  • Learning what your go-to sympathetic nervous system response is “fight, flight, or freeze” can help you be present with your body when triggered and start to listen to somatic cues

  • Our wounds hold the wisdom of our deeper desires to be loved, seen, and accepted

  • Mountain Energy versus River Energy (see video)

  • How polarity is vital to erotic tension in our relationships

  • Understanding polarity to attract a partners whose essence complements our own

  • How to balance masculine and feminine within ourselves through creating boundaries/structure and flow

Reflections

Consider your sympathetic nervous system response when triggered — fight, flight, or freeze. Look at your relationship map from last week, and meditate on your previous relationships or situations when you were triggered. If you are having trouble, ask trusted friends or family members if they can illuminate this for you. Once you’ve determined your “go-to” response, journal on these questions for 11 minutes:

Who did this to me? (fight, flight, freeze)

Who did I see do this? (fight, flight, freeze)

Bonus: What’s is one boundary you’ve had trouble holding in the past? How would you restructure that boundary now? How would you communicate it? Name three ways you could support yourself in the process.

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Week 3 :: Inner Power

* Somehow, my phone recording got cut off! If you’d like to visit the Somatic Awareness practice, it begins around 39 minutes in audio/video.

Weekly Recap

  • What did “power” mean in your household growing up? What did you have to do or who did you have to be to feel powerful? (journal for 5 minutes)

  • How do these learned power structures (familial/societal) impact your adult relationships?

  • Self-sourcing power allows us to: avoid co-dependence in relationships, stop projecting insecurities and suffering onto partners, be 100% authentic in who we are

  • Practice learning and communicating a full body “yes” and “no”

  • Full body consent is necessary to feel safe and prevent re-wounding in relationship

  • The mind can trick you, but the body never lies — repressing emotions diminishes your life force and can even be dangerous to your physical health

  • Identify patterns of how you give your power way in relationships

  • Learning your “non-negotiables” is a practice to stay in your power and hold yourself accountable

Reflections

Now that you understand Mountain and River Energy, create two lists of all the “feminine” and “masculine” traits you embody. Remember, this has nothing to do with gender, these are interdependent energies that make up everyone and everything! If you are having trouble distinguishing, consider these characteristics:

  • Mountain/Masculine qualities are directive, penetrative, goal-oriented, structured, stable, logical

  • River/Feminine qualities are receptive, non-linear, open-ended, nourishing, pleasurable, empathetic, fluid

How do you express these traits in a relationship?

Do you favor one energy over the other?

What would you like to cultivate more of?


Week 4 :: Inner Marriage

Weekly Recap

  • Pleasure is expressed through the body.

  • Opening through our closures requires training our nervous systems to expand. Never open yourself or allow yourself to be opening (energetically or physically) without full bodied consent. This practice is safest when done alone or with a committed partner.

  • Porn, like everything else is the universe, lies on a spectrum - if you are practicing embodiment, consider pleasure coming from being fully present with your body.

  • Divine consorts - the union of the masculine and feminine - exist as archetypes to show us how we can come into union within ourselves.

  • Explore your most vast intention for relationships and share them with your partner if applicable - how do relationships take you beyond interpersonal love?

  • Interpersonal love versus coming together in a space of god-love or the divine as you understand it

  • Playing with polarity in relationship - which energy do you tend to embody? Exploring these energetics in the body can be a fun way to reveal some else’s tendencies!

Reflections

where do i need balance in my relationshipS? which energy is at play (feminine/masculine)?

What is one closure i would like to open through in my personal practice?

what is the most vast intention i could hold for my relationships?

 
 

Summer 2019 Themes + Dates

Wednesday, August 7th, 2019 - 8-9 PM PST via Zoom

Personal Myth

Wednesday, August 14th, 2019 - 8-9 PM PST via Zoom

Working with Wounds

Wednesday, August 21st, 2019 - 8-9 PM PST via Zoom

Inner Power

Wednesday, August 28th, 2019 - 8-9 PM PST via Zoom

Inner Marriage Healing Ceremony



The object of your practice should first of all be yourself. Your love for the other, your ability to love another person, depends on your ability to love yourself.
— Thich Nhat Hanh
In most of our human relationships, we spend much of our time reassuring each other that our costumes of identity are on straight.
— Ram Dass
In any relationship in which two people become one, the end result is two half people.
— Wayne Dyer
Couples choose each other with an unerring instinct for finding the very person who will exactly match their own level of unconscious anxieties and mirror their own dysfunctions, and who will trigger for them all their unresolved emotional pain.
— Gabor Mate
Today, we turn to one person to provide what an entire village once did: a sense of grounding, meaning, and continuity. At the same time, we expect our committed relationships to be romantic as well as emotionally and sexually fulfilling. Is it any wonder that so many relationships crumble under the weight of it all?
— Esther Perel
A co-dependent is ‘If you’re okay, I’m okay’. A non-codependent is, ‘I can see that you’re not okay, but I’m okay, and I would like to know how you’d like me to help you find out why you’re not okay. But I’m not gonna fix you.’ So I remain in my center, with compassion for your not-okayness, but I’m neither triggered by it, nor do I try and fix it. I just keep space.
— Wendy Mandy